Life as a grieving daughter isn’t always the easiest. The pain never goes away - especially when you’re reminded of the relationships of your friends with their moms and how - now that we are in our late twenties and early thirties - the tensions we had with our moms as teens are long gone and now my friends and their moms are besties.
That bond is much different when your mother is gone, but still it’s special.
I can’t drive to her house to visit. Still, I get to see her every time I look in the mirror - I grow to look more like her as time goes on - plus, my hands are near perfect copies of hers, so that’s something I’ve grown to appreciate.
More precious to me are all the lessons she has left me.
Once my mom had gotten a big tip from a customer and we went to go buy clothes at the mall - a rare occurrence with her basic income. Before we walked in, a homeless person outside the mall asked her to spare some change. She didn’t have change for the tip - it was one large bill. She gave him the whole $100 that was for our shopping spree. She didn’t even blink.
I thought my life was over. I wouldn’t get a new Limited Too shirt for school.
I think about that experience more often than I think about all of the clothes I’ve ever owned.
She was only with me for thirteen years, but even though she didn’t graduate the top of her class, or have a fancy career or a masters degree - or any other degree, for that matter - she taught me how to work hard for all that I have.
She was a struggling single mother that worked two jobs to provide for me. More importantly, she taught me to treat the janitor no differently than the CEO, to set high expectations for myself, to be self-sufficient and self-motivated, and, as the previous anecdote might hint at, how to be generous beyond compare.
I’m not successful because I was born into money or status, I’m successful because she was my mother by the Grace of God.
Without all of the titles and certificates and salary that my friends’ parents have, I am so incredibly proud to be her daughter and I hope I have the opportunity to fill her in on the missed time and make her proud.
Happy Mother’s Day to the best and most inspirational mama there ever was.
