trust me, sixteen years ago on this day i learned that lesson at a young age when the world lost my mother - may God be pleased with her beautiful soul. the night before she died, i remember praying harder than i ever thought was possible for a cure for her… i begged God not to take her because i was terrified of the thought of my life without her. in many ways, i still am.
and He took her.
she didn’t watch me graduate from high school or college. she didn’t take photos of me at prom with the other parents. she won’t be at my wedding (but then again, i might never be at my own wedding either lol). my children won’t ever meet her and dance around the living room with her.
she’s gone.
but the lessons that i learned - and continue to learn - from losing her were far greater than the ones she could have taught me if she was here. in fact, every big and small detail of my life would probably be vastly different if she were still around. but, that’s the beauty of God and His wisdom. it’s infinitely greater than our understanding.
call your mother. go to her. tell her how much you love her. tell her you appreciate her. spend all the time you can with her… because i can’t, and for the last sixteen years that’s all i’ve ever wanted to do.
one day you will call her cell phone over and over just to hear her voice on the message machine. one day you will sit in her closet just to smell her. one day you’ll fight to stay asleep just to spend more time with her when she makes a cameo in your dreams. God will take her, too.
i know the world’s a little crazy right now, but the part we can’t see right now is that there is a greater reason. after all, we plot and we plan, but God is the best of planners. make the most of our relationships and the things that really matter while we have time to do so.
p.s. if you could please just say a little prayer for my mama today, i would appreciate it.
may God magnify all of the goodness in her soul and when He decides on her fate may the goodness fill Heaven with it’s light. may any positive thing i’ve ever done in this world reflect back on her deeds and any negative reflect only on me with Your Mercy. and God, please grant me the opportunity to go to her, tell her how much i love and appreciate her, and spend my afterlife catching up on all our lost time. <3
