#WhoIsMuhammad - Who Prophet Muhammad is to Me

The hashtag "‪#‎WhoIsMuhammad‬" was becoming popular yesterday on Twitter, and I just wanted to clear it up for anyone who is not Muslim.... and anyone who is - what exactly Prophet Muhammad (may God's peace be upon him) means to me.

He was a man, not a God...

He was the best example for all of us to follow - independent of our religion.

He made the most beautiful suggestions, one of which being, "If they [those who was fighting him] knew the peace that we have in our hearts, they would be fighting us for that."

He was not someone to be worshipped, and still we do not worship him.  We worship His Maker.

He was humble. He did chores for his wives.

He also received revelation from God. Let's just ponder that thought for a second. I am a middle manager of a real estate company and sometimes I'm stupid enough that I think doing dishes is below me.  He had a direct line to God and yet he's doing laundry - mashaAllah.

He had camel intestines thrown on him while he prayed and didn't stop praying.

He prayed unceasingly.

He had trash thrown on him daily by a certain woman and when she fell ill, he visited her.

He was the best of all of creation. Really!

Books are written about him, and even extremely famous scholars agree he is an amazing human being.

He was a father. He was a husband. He was a friend. He was a companion. He was a businessman. He was a politician. He was a military leader.  And, most importantly, he was a Prophet.

I can't even paint my nails and watch television.

In all sincerity, I wish I had one ounce of his humility, strength, and knowledge.

SubhanAllah, He prayed for me, and for you, before any of us were born and wanted us to all reach Jannah (Heaven) someday.

He loved you without knowing you... whoever you are.

How can you be surprised when I pray for God's peace upon him every time I hear his name?

And, can I tell you a little secret? He is the most beloved person in my entire life - above my mother, friends, my future husband, my future children, and everyone.  Because, without him, I would not be Muslim - and that is the greatest gift I have ever received.

Surely, a man of this character deserves respect. Thus, I don't want him to be ridiculed, mocked, or used to sell magazines, just as I would not want that for anyone I love.

So, that is just a little slice of who he is, and boy do I hope I am blessed enough to meet him in Heaven someday inshaAllah.

I CAN'T EVEN... One of the Most Frustrating Encounters To Date

So in the past few months I've been workin on my fitness (Fergie-Ferg, anyone?) and have lost mucho pounds (much needed).  So, I need new pants!! What a glorious feeling is needing new pants?! It is THE BEST - at least when you looking for smaller pants instead of bigger.

One of my besties is home from Saudia - FINALLY - after a month of being estranged from her. I was so happy to get to go shopping with her this Saturday.  Although she doesn't choose to wear traditional Muslim attire, she does not dress provacatively by any means.  She is always classy, well covered, and fabulous all at the same time - with or without hijab I would say she is modest. Beyond that, I am not worthy of judging her.

Together we may not look like the most obvious choices of friends, me in abaya and her in her fashionable outfit, but all that I care about is someone's heart - and mashaAllah she has a wonderful heart and a strong faith in Islam.  Love you, Loomz.

Anywho, we were shopping in Zara - both together (oh em gee, I like this jacket) and separately (emo as she is a size 0 and I am a size 100).  When she went to get in line to pay, I followed her in line.  Because there were many conversations going on around us, we must not have been gabbing much to one another, and then.... it happened.

There was an older woman behind me - she was foreign, but I will reserve the dignity to avoid saying where she was from.  She was maybe 55 years old and dressed.... fine.  She was dressed like any other 55 year old in a bright orange outfit.  She was standing two people behind me in line and there was another woman, from the same or a similar country directly behind me.

I didn't pay attention to them for a majority of the time in line, until Loomi got called to check out right before me.  Then, I started to pay attention to the noises around me.  The women were talking about me. 

What the heck! Don't talk about me while I'm standing literally directly in front of you! That's rude! I wanted to turn and say "hey! that's rude!" but, I thought to myself, 'no, they are older than you, Hannah, be respectful.'  So I bit my tongue.

Then, I started listening to exactly what they were saying - in English with THICK accents - #justsayin

"Wouldn't it be oppression to dress like this?" one said. (THE WORD IS OPPRESSIVE!)

"Thank God I was not born to people like this" the other said.

"There is no reason to dress that way! We should fit in with our surroundings at all times."

"America is a free country, she should dress as she wants.  In her country that must not be allowed."

I wanted to SCREAM.  I turned around and rolled my eyes, hopefully so they would get the picture that HEY! I SPEAK ENGLISH AND THAT IS SO RUDE WHAT YOU ARE SAYING!

They continued on.... with more rude comments about how "oppressed" I am in broken English.

And from the second that Loomi returned to me while I then moved forward to check out, I was FUMING in anger.  I'm thankful I didn't respond then, but I now am clear minded enough to assert what exactly I should have said, had I been intelligent at the time.

Now for what I should have done....

I should have said that it is unfair that they are judging me based on how I dress.

I should have said this is America, and I can dress as I please, and I can practice my faith openly and freely.  I should have said if you don't like that, then GET OUT OF MY COUNTRY - because that is the BEAUTY of America.

I should have said I AM AMERICAN! I should have brought up the fact that they are foreign born and I am American born, thus using their logic, I am deserving of rights beyond them.

I should have encouraged them to dress as is appropriate of a 55 year old, if they wanted to encourage me to dress "Americanized."

I should have explained that my English is not broken, nor is my spirit when I walk around in abaya and hijab.  I should have explained it is JUST THE OPPOSITE and that when I wear these pieces of cloth, I am LIBERATED in knowing that the fashion trends of 2015 will not rule my life, but God rules my life.  And, I should have pointed out that one of my best friends is wearing an outfit similar to theirs and there is no problem with that.  I am not judging, nor should they.

I should have told them that if they are going to talk about me to my back, they should say it to my face and not be so cowardly.

I am not by any means an angry person, or someone that is easily offended - usually.  Sweet little Loomi has cried when people say rude things to me before when I have laughed them off.  Most rude comments roll off my back, but not those that sting like this.  If you are proud enough to say something to my face, I would love to discuss with you like adults, but if you are going to belittle me behind my back, then you will upset me.

I wish I could reverse time and be back in that situation with this clear head... my heart is still racing while writing this post, however, so perhaps best that I continue to wait before I explore time travel.

Please, please, please, lady, STOP JUDGING ME.  Stop thinking I'm wearing this because I am oppressed.  It is my choice.  Just like it is your choice to wear a bright orange t-shirt.  Welcome to America, honey, my birth country where I can wear a bikini or a burka and be completely within my rights.

May Allah forgive me for anything negative I have said or thought about these women - particularly the one I described in detail.  May Allah forgive her for the pain and anger she put in my heart over the past five days.  May Allah continue to protect our ummah from these negative thoughts and feelings.  And, may He guide everyone in making choices - freely - that are in our best interests and are of His Favor.

Do Muslims Celebrate Christmas? How Muslims View Today

I thought this common question deserved some reflection on today, which is Christmas to the many Christians around the world. I had to chuckle when my uncle texted me, "Do you guys 'do' Christmas?"

I said, "No :)"

He said, "Oh so more like Hanukkah?"

I said, "No.  We don't have a holiday right now"

Thus, the short answer is, no, we do not celebrate (or 'do') Christmas.

We don't celebrate Hanukkah.  Nor Kwanza.

We don't put up trees, SPOILER ALERT: we don't believe in Santa, and no gifts today.

We DO, however, believe in Jesus and respect Jesus very much.  Surely, he was among the best of us.

I thought this Ayah (verse) from Quran would be appropriate to share today:

"إِذْ قَالَتِ الْمَلَائِكَةُ يَا مَرْيَمُ إِنَّ اللَّهَ يُبَشِّرُكِ بِكَلِمَةٍ مِنْهُ اسْمُهُ الْمَسِيحُ عِيسَى ابْنُ مَرْيَمَ وَجِيهًا فِي الدُّنْيَا وَالْآخِرَةِ وَمِنَ الْمُقَرَّبِينَ"

Behold! the angels said: "O Mary! Allah giveth thee glad tidings of a Word from Him: his name will be Christ Jesus, the son of Mary, held in honor in this world and the Hereafter and of (the company of) those nearest to Allah"

[Quran 3:45]

What Muslims believe is that Jesus was a WONDERFUL and highly beloved prophet with a message that was pure and this message was to worship God.

I think we are on the same page here with Christians and Muslims.

Where we differ is that we believe Jesus is not the SAME as God.  And, because we believe he was a person, not God, we do not think it is right to celebrate his birthday.  We do not celebrate the birth of Prophet Muhammad (saws) either.  We actually don't have much craziness for our own birthdays as well.  Just that we should be thankful to God for granting us another year on earth.

So, I am sorry, but I must decline your gifts.  I don't feel right in wishing you a Merry Christmas.  I can't share the "spirit of the season" with you.  But, I do respect you, your religion, and your holiday.  I understand why nothing in Los Angeles is open today.  I have love for you because we are all brothers under the same God.

My family thankfully was never over the top about Christmas.  My mother would get me a gift.  That I would hate.  We would fight.  And then we all ate mashed potatoes.  Such is life.

The Quran says that Jesus (peace be upon him) said: "I am indeed a servant of Allah: He hath given me revelation and made me a prophet; And He hath made me blessed wheresoever I be, and hath enjoined on me Prayer and Charity as long as I live;(He) hath made me kind to my mother, and not overbearing or miserable; So peace is on me the day I was born, the day that I die, and the day that I shall be raised up to life (again)!" [Quran 19:30-33]

May Allah (swt) guide us all towards His ultimate Truth.  May He help us to respect each other.  May He allow all of us to meet Him someday and surround us in His Mercy.

May Allah Be Pleased with You, Abdullah Alkadi ❤

It's been a few weeks since discovering the body of Abdullah Alkadi, and I still think about him non-stop.  I'm sure many have read the articles about him.  He was a Saudi student that mysteriously disappeared after selling his car on Craigslist.  He lives in the same town as I do, which makes the case even more terrifying to me. I was so upset by the lack of media coverage on his disappearance, I wanted to take matters into my own hands.  Surely, I couldn't do anything, but that was how angered I was by the situation.  Although I understand he is not American, I do not feel that the media coverage or information should have been distributed any differently.

A few days ago there was a Denver Bronco's fan that went missing in the middle of the game, leaving his stepson alone completely. That made the front of AOL news and many other media outlets.  He was found five days later outside a Kmart and just "had his fill of football" so decided to leave.

Abdullah was gone for an entire month without being found, very little media coverage, and not a trace.  His brother and family were here in the States trying to assist in any possible way and they had to do plenty of their own digging to get answers.  I'm very disappointed - as both an American and a girl with a heart that is undoubtedly half Saudi.

I barely knew Abdullah - just seeing him in passing - and I was not familiar with him. Reading through his Twitter - as fake as social media can be - I could tell he was genuinely a good person. He had a good heart. I knew that he didn't "have his fill of school" or something else and he wouldn't just leave his family out of nowhere.

Clearly, there was foul play involved.

When they found the murderers one month later, they found evidence of his murder in the car.  They murdered him and dumped his body a few dozen miles from LA. The killer wanted to steal the car and ended up killing him in doing so.

You can Google the details if you'd like, but what is most important here is Alkadi's spirit. His words have a kindness about them, and a purity in my opinion that I was overwhelmed by the entire situation for the month.  I felt like he was my brother, and I cannot imagine how his actual family is feeling.

The entire point of this post is this: Pray for Abdullah. Pray for Allah to have the utmost Mercy on him. Pray that he is granted shaheed as he was seeking knowledge as a student while he was killed.  Pray that his family finds justice and that they find peace. Pray that this never happens to anyone again.

Also, I hope that we can in the future encourage the media to cover the disappearance of foreigners as they would do for the disappearance of Americans.  I wonder, for example, how the media may cover my life should I be in a similar situation, as I am an American national, but I appear very different to other Americans.

If I could tell him or his family anything, as I'm fighting the tears while I type this, I would say that his purpose was to change the world, and I believe he fulfilled that. He had prayers from all over the world. His positivity greatly greatly impacted me in my personal life, and within just myself - a complete stranger - I will NEVER forget the way I felt about this story and the way I feel about him. He is in ALL of my prayers and I hope that I can have the absolute honor to meet him in Jannah someday, inshaAllah.

Allah yarhamo <3

Nice Costume! #SheiykhaStruggles

I am always disappointed on Halloween when people tell me, "great costume!"  This year I got a few, "oh how cool! She's Malificient!" It gets kind of awkward to explain I'm not wearing a costume, I wear this every day and I'm Muslim.

Recently while walking to the masjid, which should have made it very obvious I'm Muslim, someone yelled to me, "ARE YOU THE DUDE FROM SCREAM?!" Rude.

I also had a couple people scream out the window while I was walking near my work "It's not Halloween yet, b****" when they saw me in abaya and hijab.

The worst occurrence of the year, however, came as a surprise.  Worst of all, it came in front of my grandmother who is pretty adjusted to my Muslim lifestyle, but still has concerns that other people will hurt me or attack me based on my faith.

I was visiting my family in Ohio [racist capital, U.S.A.!] and went with my grandmother to buy some flowers at a grocery store.  This 75 year old man literally ran his cart into me.  I turned around to say something and saw he was an old man so in my heart I forgave him, assuming that the mistake was due to poor vision from age, or a general accident.  I was near a counter and he literally pushed me up against the counter with his force.  I could have been seriously hurt, but I was okay so I just didn't say a word.  My grandma was distracted paying for her flowers so I was happy she didn't notice and get worried.

He then said "Get out of the way. I'm coming through!"

I was shocked! How could someone be so rude! I was paralyzed from my anger and couldn't even process what had happened.

Then, the worst part, he recognized my grandmother because they live in the same neighborhood.  The conversation went like this:

Rude Old Man: "Oh my God, Julianne?! Is that you?"

My Grandmother [finally turning around]: "Oh, yah, hi there, how are you?"

Man: "I'm good - what are you doing here with this one?"

My Grandmother: "This one? This is my granddaughter... she's visiting from out of town.  You knew her mother, Cherie."

Man: "THIS IS YOUR GRANDDAUGHTER?! What are you Halloweening early?"

Me [The first words I had said the entire time, and saying it proudly]: No, I'm Muslim.

Man: "Ha!" *shakes his head*

My Grandmother looked at me, I could tell she was upset about what the guy had said to me.

Man: "I didn't know Cherie had a child, let alone one like this"

He walked away.

Although I was so upset and disgusted and hurt by what had happened, I felt better only because my grandmother was very upset by what he had said.  When he walked away she really voiced her anger towards him to me.  Later, she even called the old man's girlfriend and had words with her saying how incredibly rude what he said to me was and how I can choose to practice any faith I want to and still deserve respect.

I'm not complaining, I'm not venting, but truly I want you to understand how unnecessarily hurtful people are to me.  I literally was not doing a single thing except standing in abaya and hijab in a grocery store.  I have faith that Allah will handle any punishment this man is deserving of.

May Allah (swt) help all women in Islam and women of all faiths to avoid such encounters.  May He help my grandmother to feel more comfortable with the way that I am treated.

Welcome To My Life: An Example of a Message from Someone who Once Was Like Family

I'm not posting this for pity. Or attention. Or because I'm angry and want to retaliate. I'm posting this to show you the negativity in my life on a day-to-day basis.

I am happy to accept the negativity if it has to do with me being a brat. Every time something bad happens I always say to myself : "what did I do wrong that lead to this?"

This is a prime example of the fact I did not do anything. You may note the last message I sent this person was in regards to her son's wedding.

Except be Muslim.

My name is blocked out in blue.  Hers in black. Mind you this is a full grown ADULT - over twice my age.

Pardon the curse words.

Now, by no means am I the epitome of class in this conversation. I should definitely not have said my grandmother would rip this woman a new one... but my Grandma is pretty bada--.

I just want to show people the kind of messages I get from people who I REALLY loved.

I spent HOURS with this woman and she was like my own mother after my mother passed away. We were beyond close.

Hearing this always breaks my heart. I'm 24. I'm very intelligent. I am responsible. I am respectful. I'm also an idiot sometimes, but I have done nothing in my life not to deserve respect.

If the only thing "wrong with me" is the fact that I'm Muslim, my life is BLESSED. I'm honored.

If you're Muslim, please be more tactful than me in your responses to similar hatred.

If you're not Muslim, please never think about spreading this kind of hate, and be more conscious of the difference between sensationalized media and actual, true media.

Happy Birthday to Me 🎁🎂🎈

Alhamdulilah for another year of this amazing life, please make du'aa that inshaAllah my twenty-fourth year will be just as beautiful as all of the past ones.  Instead of gifts this year, I have asked that all of my friends and family donate to Mercy For Mankind instead. It is an organization that I am honored to be a part of for its critical message to help others understand Islam.

Donate here: www.mercy4mankind.com Thank you all for all of your encouragement, your prayers, and all of the light you bring into my life  I love each and every one of you.

Happy Hijabaversary To ME!

Happy Hijabaversary to me! Three years ago today was the first day I started wearing hijab full-time. 

I can't believe it's been three years! Time has flown by!

It is quite possibly the only piece of fabric in the world that can make me a spokesmodel just by putting it on my head. I'm constantly being judged based on our religion.

If a non hijabi does something wrong, she's just a rude girl.  I'm a rude Muslim girl.

But at the same time that it is pressure, it is also a gift- one that stems from the greatest gift of all, one Allah Himself bestowed upon me- being Muslim.

May Allah (swt) make all of us the best representations of Him that we can possibly be - no matter what we wear.

P.S. I expect gifts!